Mommy Wars

*WARNING: The following contains controversial topics of conversation.  Proceed at own risk of being offended.  

There are many different parenting styles, philosophies on child-rearing and all kinds of moms out there: crunchy, attachment, helicopter, working outside the home, stay at home, breast-feeding, bottle-feeding, Pinterest-y, Pinterest failing , pro-vacciners and anti-vaxxers…the list goes on.  We seem to accept a certain amount of “agree to disagree” between friends and relatives.  But, the claws seem to come out when these differences are highlighted on social media.  Being that I  have been mommin’ for a few years, I have been privy to quite a few battle grounds scenarios.
Let it be organic.  Some moms shop Whole Foods {or the like} aisles.  I, on the other hand, have never met an Oreo I didn’t like. I may not personally find value in shopping all organic, but to the mommas who do: right on.

Must get sleep.  Heaven forbid a fellow momma asks about sleep training and the term “cry it out” comes up; which is to say, it always does  To be completely honest, I don’t care one bit which side of the spectrum you fall on.  But, don’t ask for sleep recommendations and then judge me for my “let them cry in 15 min intervals, they will be fine” response.  I have had five kids.  I have let them cry it out and I have coddled them.  They all slept perfectly until 18 months; no matter what I did, the outcome was the same.  We are a family bed because by the fifth round of musical beds for the night, we are just too tired to care.  My personal thought is just find a way to get sleep, but to the mommas who sleep train: I am high fivin’ ya from my less than comfy bed, with probably my foot because the rest of me is covered in kids.

We all work.  I will say that if social media is any indicator of the current mom-climate, then the war between working moms and stay at home moms seems to be nearing a “white flag” stage.  I have seen much more kindness from moms toward one another in these instances.  I have done both and neither is easy; both have their pros and cons.  So basically, be the mom you want to be and/or the mom your life forces you to be.  We may not choose our circumstances, but we can choose how we react to them and I think we can all agree that, given the chance, we would choose it all again.

Don’t let them starve.  I see all kinds of anxieties related to nursing and bottle feeding.  When a mom expresses interest in transitioning to formula for one of many reasons, the typical response is to list all the things she can do to accommodate the continuation of breast feeding.  Since when did formula become the equivalent to strychnine?  I nursed my babies until I switched to formula; I say fed is best.  To the mommas nursing: it is awesome isn’t it?  To the mommas formula feeding: it is awesome isn’t it?

Crafty crafters.  As I have mentioned here, I love pinning on Pinterest.  But somehow all of my Pinterest crafts never look like the picture in the pin.  There are moms whose crafting abilities and creative memory making ideas rival that of Michelangelo; to those mommas I say: you are amazing and I love all your blogs.  And then there is me.  To those mommas on this side of the creative spectrum: you are amazing and those imperfect art pieces make for some pretty interesting holiday chatter .

Strike a nerve.  If you really wanna get moms going, mention vaccines; all out blood baths.  I understand the passion behind it all.  All I am going to say on this topic is: if you are choosing against vaccines for your child, I hope you are doing so based on reputable research and under the direction of a physician; not based on retracted studies and celebrity memoirs.  I guess I gave myself away on where I land.

I am a middle of the spectrum kind of mom.  Some things I am hard core, others I could care less; it seems to average out.  I am mommin’ the best I know how.  I don’t take the title lightly, and I am sure you don’t either.

Moms, we spend a lot of time preaching acceptance and kindness, but we don’t always seem to practice it {online}.  Put the boxing gloves away and bring the kumbayas out.

I’ll bring the s’mores.



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